A Year Older, A Year Wiser

    I'm another year older today. Can't help but to reflect on the years gone by. I am having a sweet time reminiscing the past, my achievements, memories with people I've loved and cared for. And of course, I also revisited the sad moments, the heartaches, the failures and disappointments.

    Although the past does not define my future, it shapes up and made me who I am today. Sometimes it is necessary to review the past so we can understand our present and create a better future. We don't have to dwell on our past mistakes and disappointments. Instead, we use them as a tool for learning, to avoid doing the same mistakes over and over again. Experience is always the best teacher. 

    Though I'm not an Apple fan (I'm a linux user, I love Android and everything Google), but I like Steve Jobs. One of my favorite quotes is "Again, you can't connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something - your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life."

    It's true.The past prepares us for our future. If it weren't for our past we wouldn't be the strong person we are today. Past hurts may have left us some scars but it's purpose is to remind us of how much pain we have endured so there's no reason why we cannot overcome any difficulties we encounter in the future.

    I used to blame others and see myself as a victim of some unfortunate circumstances. But that kind of mentality only pushed me down further into the depths of bitterness and denial. So I stopped looking outward and started the journey inward. Only then I realized that I am responsible for my own misery. We may not be able to stop other people from hurting us but no one else can take us out from that seemingly insurmountable ordeal. We have the power to either submit to misery and prolong the pain or acknowledge it and move on. We create our own heaven and hell and we shape our own future.

    Rejection and failure is another form of evil. But now I look at it as a blessing in a painful form.  I used to  beat myself up over my mistakes and spend enormous amount of time thinking about "I should have done things differently." As I grew older and wiser, I began to realize that mistakes are there to teach us a lesson. Sometimes, no matter how hard we tried we are still doomed to fail. It's inevitable, there's nothing you can do with it, you can only learn from it. 

    Everything we do (emotionally, intellectually, physically, spiritually) is an investment. Each time you invest success is never guaranteed. Failure means we made a mistake and  we made a poor judgement. Once you recognize the factors that led you to failure then you know what to do next. But failing for the first time doesn't mean you will win the second time around. Life is constant error detection and correction process. Everyday we invest, hence everyday there is a possibility of losing and winning. Judgement is the key. Poor judgement can lead you to further damage. Change your game plan until you get the right formula to success. Allow yourself to fail, take time to process it and move forward. Connecting the dots means you connect the negative and positive aspects of your past so you can  invest on healthier opportunities. Trust in something, and that something is your judgement. Success depends on how well you exercise your judgement every single day. 

    I have changed and grown so much these past years. I am grateful of my failures and looking forward to my future. There are still so many battles to lose and win and so many lessons to learn. Everyday I commit myself to become a better person. Everyday I try my best to make wise decisions and everyday is an opportunity for me to grow out of my mistakes and reap the rewards of success. I am a work in progress.

Happy birthday to me!

Setting Boundaries

    Living in this world can be tough. Most of the time we don't get what we want. People don't always treat us the way we want to be treated. We all have different experiences, we tend to have different personalities. Sometimes you get into a point where you feel like you need to change your perception on someone, specially if that person is constantly giving you uncomfortable feelings, showing signs of dishonesty and throwing empty promises every now and then. 

    If a person keeps giving you a shady behavior, then it's time to ring the alarm. Be vigilant and always trust your instinct. There are a lot of people out there who are wrapped up with their own fantasies, who actually believes in their own lies and lure you away from reality. Some of them may constantly deceive others with illusions just to get an ego stroke. 

    When dishonesty becomes their lifestyle, there is nothing much you can do with it. A bad behavior is a bad behavior. If you think that there is no basis of truth on that  behavior then there's no sense normalizing it. Better spend your energy elsewhere, to people whom you can trust and is worth your time. Don't let somebody walk all over you and take advantage of you. You have limits to what you can put up with.

    How long does it take you to realize that things isn't working for you. If you think that you are already selling yourself short, don't hold on to it. Cut yourself free. Step away from the source of stress. Don't be afraid to press the eject button. You can't sit around and wait for people to change. Transforming another person is not your responsibility. They will change if they want to but not on your own terms.

    Get real, be authentic even if others are not. Stick with your values and live with your own set of rules and boundaries. Love yourself more. And most of  all trust your judgement.

Time for a Change?

    Life is about choices. Everyday we make decisions. Big or small, it directly affects our whole being. Sometimes we struggle with our choices. Why? Because we are afraid of change. We don't want to face the unknown and would rather stay in our own comfort zone, stay in a routine than make changes.

    People stay in unhealthy relationships because they are afraid to live alone. People stick to the jobs they hate because they are afraid of instability.  A lot of people embraced emptiness for years. They survived because they get used to it. Most of us get used to average, to second best.

    But sometimes, you just need to make that change. If things aren't working out the way you think they should be then maybe it's about time to pack your bags and go. If  you feel like the dream you are chasing is not meant for you, then dream another dream. Start climbing another mountain. You have to close and start a new chapter in your life one way or another. Build a life that you really want and what you think you can do well.

    So go forth, decide to make that change, stick with it and finish the race. If you lose then you can always join another race. Get rid of all bad habits and change for the better. And when you make a decision to change, make every day an act of commitment. You  are responsible for your own life and only you can  make that change. 

Cleaning Up the Clutter

    The start of the year is a perfect time to assess our life and come up with good resolutions. This year, I have decided to create a blog not only to express my thoughts but to inspire others. I'll start with nothing but positive vibes. I'll talk about love and life. Anything that makes us feel good about ourselves and how to take control of our  lives.

    Everyday we are always surrounded by negative energy. We are often get consumed by depressing thoughts which put us to downward spiral of negativity.   Our past wounds can hinder our present happiness. We can never be happy if we keep dragging along the pain in the past. Anger and resentment could be damaging to our total well-being. According to Buddha “Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else—you are the one who gets burned."  If we carry anger, then we end up getting angry most of the time. If we feel good, then we find plenty of reasons to feel good about. Our perception of events is entirely up to us. We just need to decide whether to feel happy or dwell on sadness.

    Our lives are well too cluttered. . It's about time to clean up our mess, physically, emotionally and mentally and start living happily. We all deserve a blissful life.

    Perhaps this will give me a start on my resolution for the new year. May yours be a truly happy one.

Transforming the New Year

"Even though you may want to move forward in your life, you may have one foot on the brakes. In order to be free, we must learn how to let go. Release the hurt. Release the fear. Refuse to entertain your old pain. The energy it takes to hang onto the past is holding you back from a new life."


Every new beginning comes from some other beginnings end. Moving on to 2012 means letting go of the past. To let go of the baggage that has been serving a heavy weight on us for a long period of time. That was THEN and this is NOW. It's time to shed the pain and focus on this moment and the future.